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BlogTrust Me

Peacemaking On Your Team

by Ron Potter

Peacemaking Leaders

The times demand that leaders bring peace to their organizations and teams. Peacemaking can be rare in our cultural climate, but that doesn’t have to be true in your company.

A peacemaking leader is a leader who:

  • seeks to create calm within the storms of business.
  • understands the positive role of conflict in building a solid team.
  • is creative, energy-filled calm when employees can feel under siege and at the mercy of chaos.
  • who stays steady in the turbulence and work with them to create new answers, new plans, and a new future.

Planting Seeds of Peace

This kind of leader can bring about peace by making meaning out of the mess. The times demand that flexibility and humility replace rigid systems and pride.

The predictable environment is outdated, but to ensure quality, solid staff relationships, and employee achievement, leaders must embrace the peacemaker role and bring meaning to everything that is done or will be done.

This may sound like a daunting task. But even spreading a few small seeds of peace consistently will make such a difference—long term. Max Lucado put it this way:

Take a seed the size of a freckle. Put it under several inches of dirt. Give it enough water, light, and fertilizer. And get ready. A mountain will be moved. It doesn’t matter that the ground is a zillion times the weight of the seed. The seed will push it back.

Every spring, dreamers around the world plant tiny hopes in overturned soil. And every spring, their hopes press against impossible odds and blossom.

Never underestimate the power of a seed.

As far as I know, James, the epistle writer, wasn’t a farmer. But he knew the power of a seed sown in fertile soil.

“Those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of goodness.”

Become a leader who sows seeds of peace.

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BlogTeamTeam Series

Team Elements – Truth: Summary

by Ron Potter

Over the last several blog posts we’ve been on a TREC to discover the elements of highly effective and happy teams. The reason I use the word “happy” here is because this is the highest level of Aristotle’s four levels of Happiness. Being a part of a highly effective team will provide some of your greatest moments of happiness.

TREC comes from:

  • Truth
  • Respect
  • Elegance
  • Commitment

The acronym TREC sounds the same as the word TREK. The definition of a TREK is “A trip or movement especially when involving difficulties or complex organization: an arduous journey.”

Building a great team in a complex organization during difficult times is an arduous journey.

We have spent several posts unpacking our understanding of the complex issues of Truth. Highly effective teams can share the “truth,” but the concept of truth can become very complex.

There are three concepts that must be understood to share the “truth.”

To get at the truth, a team must TAP into the underlying issues:

  • Trust
  • Assumptions
  • Perceptions

Trust

Building trust is part of the long, arduous journey. It requires humility, development, focus, commitment, compassion, integrity, peacemaking and endurance.

Without these elements in place with each member of the team, you’ll never be able to build the trust required to tell the truth to each other. You must talk about these elements. You must hold each other accountable. It’s the first step required to make it through an arduous journey of building great teams.

Assumptions

The second step in TAPPING into the underlying issues of building a great team based on Truth is Beliefs and Assumptions. A team at MIT developed the concept of Triple Loop Learning. Unless you start with understand everyone’s beliefs and assumptions, you can’t provide useful systems, processes, procedures, policies, to guide and direct complex organizations on their arduous journey. Beliefs and Assumptions will always win the day over systems. They’ll win the day either overtly or covertly. And usually, the covert path is the chosen. Therefore, if your systems, processes, procedures, policies don’t seem to be solving your problems, you haven’t brought all the Beliefs and Assumptions to the surface. They are covertly sabotaging your efforts.

Perceptions

We each have different perceptions. Perceptions are modified by events and experiences over time. If you, as a team leader or a team member assume that you have the “truth” and don’t realize that you have one of many perceptions, just like everyone else, an effective team will never materialize. Just like Beliefs and Assumptions, you must honor and respect everyone’s perspectives as valid before you can get at the Team Truth that is required to build great teams.

TAP into Greatness

To experience the sweetness of wonderful maple syrup, you must TAP into the trunk of the tree. Oak trees have deep TAP roots to withstand the ravages of nature. Whatever analogy you want to use, you must TAP into the core of your team to build the foundation of Truth.

  • Trust
  • Assumptions
  • Perceptions

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BlogTeamTeam Series

Team Elements – Truth: Truth with Half a Brain

by Ron Potter

Do you use half or all of your brain to understand the truth?

We’ve been introducing and preparing ourselves to walk through the elements that make great teams. The first of these is Truth. Great teams can tell each other the truth. But truth needs some special understanding.

“Any one with half a brain…”

“Anyone with half a brain can see the truth.” That’s an old saying that expresses some derision toward someone who doesn’t see the truth as you see it. The implication is that if you used even half your brain, you would see the truth.

Have you noticed that people (sometimes yourself) “know” the truth? But if you point out to them that someone else sees things differently, their reaction is the other person has a perspective, but you have the truth.

Separating the brain

Years ago, it was discovered that the cure for people who have extreme epilepsy is to sever their brain halves. Each half of the brain is still fully functional; it’s just that the two halves don’t communicate with each other anymore.

For people who went through this procedure, their epilepsy issues were cured. One patient said “You don’t notice that your brain halves are not working together. You just adapt to it. You don’t feel any different than you did before.” However, the researchers did notice a difference.

To further clarify this difference they created an experiment with some of the earliest patients. These first experiments were conducted in the days before the personal computer, so they used the technology available to them at the moment, a View-Finder. With a View-Finder, each eye sees a slightly different image. The intended purpose was to give a sense of 3-D depth perception. The researchers modified this technology slightly and gave the patient entirely different photos in each eye. In the right eye, they showed the patient a picture of a women. In the left eye, there was a picture of a man.

Before placing the View-Finder to the patient’s eyes, they asked the patient to describe what they saw in the View-Finder. After a few seconds of observing, the patient described the women (in her right eye) in complete detail. When asked if she saw anything else the answer was “No, I described the woman as completely as I could.”

Then the patient was asked to repeat the experiment, but this time instead of describing what she saw, she was to pick out the image of what she saw from a group of images. After viewing the View-Finder for a few seconds, the patient pointed to the picture of the man that appeared in the left eye. In both cases, the pictures of the man and the woman appeared in the same eye. However, the patient was “manipulated” to either verbalize what she saw or point to a point at what she saw. In other words, the researchers could control which image the person saw and remembered by setting them up ahead of time. Verbal description caused the person to describe the image in the right eye. Muscle and physical control caused the person to describe the image in the left eye. Their “truth” was dictated simply by prepping them for how they would answer the question.

A similar experiment conducted with another patient years later with the use of a personal computer provided the same results. This time the patient was asked to concentrate on a dot right in the middle of their computer monitor, and then two images were flashed on the screen: one image to the right of the dot, the other image to the left of the dot.

When the patient was asked to describe what they saw, they described the hammer that appeared to the right of center. When asked to draw what they saw, they drew the screwdriver that appeared to the left of center. When asked to describe what they had drawn, the answer was a screwdriver. When asked why they drew a screwdriver when they originally described a hammer the answer was “I don’t know.”

So, what was truth to that person? The man or the woman? The hammer or screwdriver? The answer is both answers were true. But the brain used some pre-determined criteria to be aware of and record for memory the “truth.”

Current day brain science has taken us a step further. Because of the functional MRI, brain scientist can track an image as it enters through our eyes all the way to being implanted in our memory. What they have found is that the image doesn’t go directly to memory. They’ve been able to determine that once our eye perceives the image, it is parsed into about 127 million bits of information, sent through at least 12 (they think as many as 24) processing centers in the brain, then processed through the older centers of the brain for object recognition and motion detection before being reassembled in our memory.

These early discovered centers include:

  • Values
  • Emotions
  • Goals
  • Beliefs
  • Ideas
  • Happy/Sad
  • Memories
  • Pain
  • Stress

This clears up the old question, do you believe what you see or see what you believe. You see what you believe.

Team Perspective

Courtroom judges will tell you that if two eyewitnesses tell the court exactly the same version of what happened, they know they’ve colluded. Judges know that no two people see the same event in exactly the same way.

So, if our goal is to speak the truth with each other or to get at the truth as a team, we need to start with the premise that we each have our perspective. Great teams value and understand each of those unique perspectives and then work hard to develop a collective team “truth.” What will be the team perspective based on all of our individual perspectives? What will be the truth that solutions will based on so that the team can move forward with unity and commitment?

By sharing beliefs and assumptions plus perspective of the situation, great teams begin to build an understanding of what they face and how to move forward.

Use your whole brain plus have the respect (next series of blog posts) to allow for the diverse points of view held by all team members. You’ll have a better chance of succeeding and be happier doing it.

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BlogTeamTeam Series

Team Elements – Truth: Truth Depends on Beliefs

by Ron Potter

We’ve been introducing and preparing ourselves to walk through the elements that make great teams. The first of these is Truth. Great teams can tell each other the truth. But Truth needs some special understanding.

To create a truthful and dynamic atmosphere, teams must:

  • Develop and maintain Trust
  • Be able to share their Beliefs and Assumptions openly and without recrimination
  • Believe that every member of the team has a Valid Perception of the issue.

In the last post, we talked about building the trust required to share the truth. In this post, we’ll talk about how our beliefs and assumptions shape our truth.

Beliefs and Assumptions

Years ago, Peter Senge wrote a book titled The Fifth Discipline that was a deep book but had a profound effect on the corporate world. This book about systems thinking was based on work by Gregory Bateson and extended by Chris Argyris and Peter Senge. It known as Systems Thinking or Learning Organizations. I had never seen a concept penetrate the halls of corporations as much as these ideas.

It seemed that I couldn’t walk into any of my client companies without them wanting to show me how they were adapting system thinking or becoming a learning organization or both. It was an amazing tidal wave.

But much of this impact was related with the second loop of what Senge and company referred to as triple loop learning. In brief, let me describe the three loops.

The first loop says that you do some work, you observe the results. If you’re not satisfied, you put in a fix, and you do the work again. I’ve seen this first loop referred to as “Following the Rules” or “Are we doing the right thing.” I started to think of it as a “do loop” from my early computer days. We would talk about a computer program that was hung up as being in a “do loop.” That meant the program was running in circles and couldn’t get out. The first loop of triple loop learning is much like that do loop. Do some work, check the results, put in a fix, do some work, check the results, put in a fix, etc.

Senge and team began to talk about the second loop as a longer, more sustainable loop. In this loop that wanted you to think about an issue as not needing a fix but as part of an entire system. Check your policies, procedures, systems, and processes to see what is directing the work. If you put the proper system in place that guides the work you’ll get better, more sustainable results. But it required system redesigns and re-engineering. These are the words that my clients were using. They wanted to show me their re-engineering work and their systems redesign and the improved results. And indeed, they were getting improved results. But maybe not the best results possible. The third loop of triple-loop learning was required. Unfortunately, I didn’t see many of my clients looking at the third loop. Why?

The third loop examines the team’s Beliefs and Assumptions about an issue before the redesign or re-engineering takes place. If your personal beliefs don’t agree with the redesigned system, beliefs will override or ignore the system. If the system was redesigned based on an issue or observation that doesn’t match your assumptions, there is no true belief that the new system will produce the desired results. Beliefs and Assumptions rule the day!

Senge and company believed that by fully sharing and understanding Beliefs and Assumptions you would improve the quality of thinking and interactions and in doing so would experience more sustainable improvements. They also believed this would not be a one-time fix but would result in continued improvement of thinking, interactions, and results. Now you would become a Learning Organization.

Working Out Beliefs

Sharing of Beliefs and Assumptions is the second part of building a high-quality team that provides the highest level of happiness for the team members. But, this is a muscle or discipline that develops through training just like going to the gym to improve any part of your body.

I’m assuming here that you’ve successfully created an atmosphere of trust that will allow for the sharing of Beliefs and Assumptions. But, the first time you engage a new muscle group the results are painful. And the rest of the body must adapt to the higher performing muscle group before all of the pain and awkwardness ceases.

The first time teams practice sharing Beliefs and Assumptions there is hesitancy, holding back, embarrassing moments and even shock and disbelief from others on the team as you get used to sharing at this deep level. But even with this first awkward attempt, teams find that the solution they reach as a team is often better than most past experiences. And, as teams get better at this level of sharing at the beginning of problem-solving, it becomes almost addictive. If you’ve become comfortable with starting the process by sharing Beliefs and Assumptions, and then you walk into a team that has not developed this same muscle, you can hardly stand to face the amateur approach to problem-solving. That becomes painful.

Develop the Beliefs and Assumptions muscle. You’ll become a much more Truthful team, and you’ll become a powerful problem-solving team. And that will make you happy.

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Being GenuineBlogCulture

Being Genuine – Part III

by Ron Potter

This blog series is based on an article written by Travis Bradberry in Forbes titled “12 Habits of Genuine People.” You can read the previous installments here and here.

Here is his list of 12:

  1. They don’t try to make people like them.
  2. They don’t pass judgment.
  3. They forge their own paths.
  4. They are generous.
  5. They treat everyone with respect.
  6. They aren’t motivated by material things.
  7. They are Trustworthy.
  8. They are thick-skinned.
  9. They put away their phones.
  10. They aren’t driven by ego.
  11. They aren’t hypocrites.
  12. They don’t brag.

In this post I would like to consolidate points 5 and 9.

Phones and Respect

The real focus here is point number 9, “They put away their phones.” But I believe it relates directly to point 5, “They treat everyone with respect.”

When Bradberry writes about point number five, he emphasizes everyone. I don’t want to lose that emphasis. Genuine people treat all people with respect. You can watch their interactions with people who are farther up the organizational structure and people who are on the bottom rungs. It doesn’t make any difference. By observing their actions, you could not tell where the person “ranked” based on the interchange. One of my best indicators is how people treat wait staff when they encounter them. I have a high regard for people who treat the people who are serving them with great respect.

Phones

There is so much research on the bad impact of having our phones front and center all the time it would take an entire book to go into the impact. All negative impact.

I run a lot of team meetings in my work. To me, good teaming is at the heart of great organizations. The name of my company starts with the word Team. I’ve been facilitating meetings as a consultant for nearly 30 years and was either running them or a part of them in the corporate world for 20 years prior to that. Nothing! Nothing disrupts and minimizes the productivity of team meetings more than phones.

I’ve seen CEO’s keep their phone just under the lip of the table assuming that no one will notice their constant peeks or their occasional responses to email or messages. Do they really think everyone else in the room is that stupid? Apparently.

I’ve watched the MD get a text and immediately get up with a show of how important they are and explain that they need to answer this right away. A young working mom told me once that she received so many calls from her children over this argument or that disagreement that she finally resorted to one question. “Is there blood involved?” If not, she’ll handle it later. That young mom had apparently learned more than an MD. If there’s no blood involved, don’t exhibit the disrespect by leaving the room for an “important” call.

Seek to Understand First

Steven Covey wrote the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Rule number 5 is “Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood.” Mr. Covey had discovered that as human beings, we’re much more interested in listening to your point of view once you’ve shown the respect to fully listen to and understand my point of view. Having a phone in hand during the conversations sends the message that you’re really not fully interested in understanding. There are far more important things to respond to on my phone than stand here and listen to your point of view.

Put the Phone Away

Putting the phone away not only makes you a more genuine person, a person that people want to follow. It also makes you much more effective. If leadership and effectiveness are two things you believe will benefit you in the long run, PUT THE PHONE AWAY!

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BlogCultureOrganizational Integrity

Integrity-Based Leadership

by Ron Potter

To have a great organization, integrity must be widespread.

So what does this look like?

As leader, you are the key. Integrity and trust are inseparable; one cannot exist without the other. According to Charles O’Reilly and Karlene Roberts,

Leaders who build trusting relationships within their team are willing to consider alternative viewpoints and to make use of other people’s expertise and abilities. They feel comfortable with the group and are willing to let others exercise influence over group decisions. In contrast, managers in a distrustful environment often take a self-protective posture. They’re directive and hold tight the reins of power. Those who work for such managers are likely to pass the distrust on by withholding and distorting information.

How does integrity-based leadership work?

In a research study, several groups of business executives were asked to be involved in a role-playing exercise. The groups were given identical factual information about a difficult policy decision, and then they were asked to solve a problem related to that decision. Half of the groups were briefed to expect trusting behavior from the members of their group; the other half were told to expect untrusting behavior (“You cannot openly express feelings or differences with members of your group”).

After thirty minutes of discussion, each group member as well as those who had observed the role playing completed a questionnaire. The responses were in harmony with each other: The discussions among members in the high-trust group were significantly more positive than the discussions among members of the low-trust group. In fact, people in the low-trust group who tried to be open and honest were virtually ignored. Hostility was caused by a mere suggestion, and it quickly spread throughout the group. The people in the low-trust groups realized that the lack of trust kept them from high achievement. They did not feel free to be vulnerable due to the actions and rejection of other group members.

Here are some findings on the high-trust group:

  • Members were more open about their feelings.
  • Members experienced greater clarity of thinking.
  • Members searched for more alternative courses of action.
  • Members reported greater levels of mutual influence on outcomes.

The high-trust group opened the gate of personal vulnerability, and the result was a better team and a model of integrity-based leadership.

When people do not trust one another, it is difficult for the organization to succeed and for the people within the organization to feel completely fulfilled. People who feel trusted and who trust their leaders are more satisfied, and their work environment is less stressful. There exists a feeling of openness and confidence and a greater ability for people to believe they can take risks.

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Being GenuineBlogCulture

Being Genuine – Part II

by Ron Potter

In my last blog post, I set up this series of posts based on an article written by Travis Bradberry in Forbes a couple of years ago titled “12 Habits of Genuine People.”

Here is his list of 12:

  1. They don’t try to make people like them.
  2. They don’t pass judgment.
  3. They forge their own paths.
  4. They are generous.
  5. They treat everyone with respect.
  6. They aren’t motivated by material things.
  7. They are trustworthy.
  8. They are thick-skinned.
  9. They put away their phones.
  10. They aren’t driven by ego.
  11. They aren’t hypocrites.
  12. They don’t brag.

I would like to add my comments and observations to these over the next few blogs.

Ego, Hypocrite, Braggart

Let me start by consolidating the last three on the list, Genuine people aren’t driven by ego, aren’t hypocrites and don’t brag. These three are related in some way.

Ego and bragging are driven by fear. Every time someone says to me, “That person certainly has a big ego”, my first reaction is to wonder what it is they fear. I’m going to suggest that we all have a fear of “being found out.” I know that I deal with this one a lot. Once they discover that I’m just a simple guy from a small town with a degree in engineering (rather than psychology or organizational development) they’ll wonder why I’m here to be a team and leadership consultant/coach. But if we realize that we each bring a unique experience, understanding, and curiosity to every situation, we begin to realize that we do indeed have value. We don’t need to brag about it or let our ego get in the way.

Being a hypocrite is slightly different in that they don’t necessarily practice what they preach. The root of the word meant “stage actor”. The actor was pretending to be someone they weren’t. Being a hypocrite is putting up a false front, pretending to be someone you’re not. It takes the concept of “being found out” one step further. A hypocrite has no intention of being found out. No intention of being genuine or real. They’ll put on their game face and keep up the false front in any circumstance. You never really know who they are or what they really stand for.

I have two experiences with my clients that penetrate their “game face.” One is when I do a feedback session with them and another is when I run an exercise I call “Human Beings, not Human Doings” in team sessions.

Shedding the Game Face

As part of my consulting practice, I often do 360 feedback sessions. It gains the term 360 because it gathers data from all around the candidate, Direct Reports, Peers, and Boss.

I’ve noticed through the years that my client will walk into these sessions with a very strong “game face.” Whatever they see as their signature approach, direct, unyielding, humorous, carefree, it doesn’t make a difference, they’re determined to maintain that game face through the session.

However, as we begin to investigate the depths of the feedback and the responses from the 360 are different than the self-assessment, I notice a change in their face. It’s a real physical change. Muscles begin to relax or deform, eyes seem less steely, the shape of the mouth can change dramatically. When they begin to drop their protective barrier and begin receiving real, direct feedback their game face begins to change. Their face begins to change. They turn to a more genuine person.

Another exercise I run is Human Beings, not Human Doings. In this exercise performed with a team, each person talks about people or events which have profoundly shaped their values and behaviors. For a moment people are talking about who they are, not what they do. This exercise has never failed to include tears, hearty laughter, great sympathy, and real understanding. For a moment, people have shed their game face.

Genuine Person

When you’re a genuine person, there is no need for ego, hypocrisy or bragging. Every human being is unique, wonderful, enjoyable, enthusiastic and curious. Don’t hide behind your game face. Don’t be an actor on stage. Be a genuine human being. People will want to be part your world and what you stand for. This is the basis for great leadership.

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BlogCulture

When trying to help isn’t helpful

by Ron Potter

How many times have you used the following phrases? I should probably ask, “How many times have you heard the following phrases?” We often don’t hear our own words, but we sure hear others words.

  • Don’t do it that way.
  • This will work better.
  • I see your problem.
  • Have you thought of…
  • I’ll correct that for you.
  • I can help.

These words and phrases are often used under the guise of trying to help. But, are they helpful?

What’s your reaction when someone says, “Don’t do it that way.”

  • Fine, do it yourself.
  • I’ll wait for you to tell me specifically what to do. (And I won’t do anything else)

Reaction to any of the other statements will be similar.

  • This will work better. (Not if you understood the entire issue)
  • I see your problem. (It’s not my problem, it’s our problem and you don’t see all the issues)
  • Have you thought of.. (We’ve had a team working on this and thought about every possible angle you can think of)
  • I’ll correct that for you. (Fine, then the problem is yours)
  • I can help. (Not by second guessing everything we’ve done)

So how does someone truly help?

  • First by genuinely asking if help is wanted.
  • If the answer is yes. Then by asking what form of help might be useful or desired.

Notice that so far, no specific “help” have been offered. But by asking what type of help would be useful, there may be multiple answers.

  • If you could cover this other project while we grapple with this one, that would be great.
  • Would you simply listen to the issues as we’ve framed them and see if anything else comes to mind?
  • Would you mind compiling some of this data for us? I think if we could see it all together it might be useful.

Usually, the best form of help you can offer is simply asking what type of help would be useful. Once the person or team is confident that you really want to help in any way you can, multiple ways of helping will become evident.

Don’t express what you think will help. Simply offer to help in any way needed. People really appreciate it.

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BlogTeam

I Wouldn’t Have

by Ron Potter

“I wouldn’t have done it that way!” These are very easy words to express but what do they really mean? Most people who use these words, or some such sentiment, will tell you:

  • They’re only trying to help
  • They’re helping the person learn
  • They want the other person to see things from a different perspective.

Those are all great reasons, but, do the words “I wouldn’t have done it that way” express those positive intentions? I don’t think so.

To me those words:

  • Assign blame
  • Shift accountability
  • Feed the ego and superiority attitudes

Using these words could also be considered a cheap shot or a cowardly statement.

Lots of factors need to be considered when decisions are made. When a person is not present and engaged in the decision-making process they:

  • Don’t know the circumstances
  • Aren’t aware of the dilemma’s the decision maker faced
  • Are looking at the decision from the perspective of hindsight

The more impactful decisions are very difficult to make. If you weren’t there as part of the decision-making process, don’t second guess.
What if your intention is to truly help? Help the person think through their decision-making process. Help them learn. Don’t second guess.

You may want to try things like:

  • What has changed since the decision was made?
  • Were there other perspectives that might have been useful at the time?
  • Was input received from relevant sources?
  • Was there pressure to make any decision at the time?

The answer to these and other questions may lead to a better decision-making process in the future. Or, the conclusion may be that the best decision was made at the time. Use these learning efforts to reinforce the decision maker. Support them. Help them grow.

Don’t second guess. It’s not useful.

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BlogCulture

Restoration or Revenge

by Ron Potter

Team Unity is the most powerful productivity booster that can be applied.

There are several “multipliers” to team productivity. One is trust. Another is respect. And you need both in place to build unity. But unity is the greatest productivity booster of all.

Whenever people are involved there will always be conflict and friction. It’s just the nature of things. How we respond to the conflict and friction will determine the value of the team.

Revenge is a power play. When you take a tit-for-tat approach to conflict and friction it’s because you want to maintain power over the other person. Teams are not built on power, they’re built on unity.

Unity requires reconciliation. Reconciliation requires giving up power and control. This doesn’t mean you need to give up your beliefs and assumptions or cave into another person’s need for power and control but it does take humility. The original definition of humility meant tremendous power under complete control. Being under control means self-control, not controlling others. Restoration helps build trust.

Restoration means reaching out to others. Listening to their point of view. Not arguing or countering every point they make but attempting to understand their background, experiences, beliefs, and assumptions that are leading to their position. Steven Covey addressed this approach in his 7 Habits of Highly Successful People when he said, “Seek to understand first before being understood.” Few people seem to have the patience to fully understand the other person before expressing their point of view but when it does happen, it is very powerful.

However, there are occasions that despite the effort to understand and reconcile, the other person may not be willing to reconcile. In these cases, there is an ancient process that says bring one or two others with you to help reconcile. That doesn’t mean that you bring one or two supporters to overcome your “opponent.” It does mean to bring one or two others to help assure that the process is facilitated well and that both sides are completely understood.

If after making the effort with a good facilitator or two, reconciliation still seems to allude you, this is an issue that needs to come to the team. Letting it fester in the background or simply agreeing to disagree will never bring the trust and unity needed to build a great team. Great teams reach unity and commitment. Without unity and commitment, the full power of the team will never be realized.

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Caring in Action: Communication
BlogCaring in ActionTrust Me

Caring in Action: Communication

by Ron Potter

Caring becomes real to another person only when some action occurs. I believe that communication, confrontation, and challenge are three of the best ways a leader puts “feet” to true caring.

Over the next few weeks, we’ll unpack each of these aspects of caring and will start this week with communication.

Communication

The groundbreaking book In Search of Excellence stressed the concept known as MBWA, “management by walking around.” The concept is taken further in the book A Passion for Excellence:

How good are you? No better than your people and their commitment and participation in the business as full partners, and as business people. The fact that you get them all together to share whatever—results, experiences, recent small successes and the like—at least once every couple of weeks seems to us to be a small price indeed to pay for that commitment and sense of teamwork and family. The “return on investment” is probably far and away the best of any program in the organization.

MBWA stresses getting out of our individual comfort zones and getting to know other people. Whether you attend company-wide meetings or individual private sessions, the lesson is clear: Get out of your office and communicate with your people.

We tend to assume that communication is merely the process of delivering information from one person to another. However, it is much more than just good delivery. Pat Williams writes,

Communication is a process by which we build relationships and trust, share meaning and values and feelings, and transcend the aloneness and isolation of being distinct, individual souls. Communication is not just a data dump. Communication is connection.

How we express ourselves positively or negatively affects our listeners. The message intertwines with the messenger. More sobering is the fact that listeners may never hear our message because it is not in a form they appreciate.

Communication means being connected with your people. It means getting out of your office into their offices and workspaces.

Next week we’ll continue to work through caring in action by exploring confrontation.

 

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Are you just a Big Splash?

by Ron Potter

As an engineer, I learned about laminar flow. Let’s take the example of water for a minute. A lot of engineering science goes into what’s called laminar flow, which means aligning all the molecules of water in the same direction. We know from our science work in high school that water is made up of H2O, two hydrogens, and one oxygen molecule. When the engineers start filtering and aligning and pushing each one of these molecules in precisely the same direction, that’s known as laminar flow. Water in laminar flow is incredibly powerful. It can cut through solid steel.  If it doesn’t quite achieve laminar flow, all it does is splash off the surface because there’s no alignment of the molecules. Is your team able to cut through the toughest issues or does it just splash and get everyone wet?

Once again I recently heard a CEO say,

Well, that’s not true, but that’s their perception.”

Implied in that statement is that he, and maybe he alone, knows the truth. Those other poor, well-meaning souls only have their perception. Unfortunately, many people believe their perception is the truth. Every day, more brain research is showing us that what we see and hear is processed through multiple brain centers dealing with memories, beliefs, emotions, and others before the image, or the audio file is stored in our memory. That means from the time we observe something through sight or sound, it’s completely processed in our brain based on who we are before the memory is stored in our brain.

Unfortunately, we think of our memory as if it were a computer hard drive. It’s a poor analogy. With a hard drive, we can go back several years later and retrieve the data that was placed on the hard drive, and it’s exactly the same data that was initially stored. But when we retrieve data from our brain, it has been constantly modified before placing in memory. We have further learned that even after a memory has been placed in our brain, it is continually being modified with every new experience from the moment it was initially stored. We don’t have reality in our brain. We only have our perception, and even that is being continually modified.

When we get into high levels of trust and respect for our teammates, we begin to realize that we each have valid perceptions, and our jobs as members of the leadership team are to form our collective reality from the multiple perceptions. We do this, so we can align and move forward together. We have different perspectives. But, we need to build a valid ‘reality’ of our perceptions so that we can move forward together. Without it, we will continue to move in different directions, diluting, diffusing our energy and trust, and creating nothing more than a big splash. When we line up all the “molecules” of our perceptions we begin to generate some real power.

Perception Quote

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