One of my clients recently made the statement that it was harder to say “I’m wrong” than it was to say “I’m sorry.” Therefore, he was always quick to admit when he was wrong (Thanks Simon). Isn’t that interesting? He had learned that it was easier to take the hard route than it was to take the easy route.
I didn’t have much time to think about that statement the rest of that day but then I had a long plane ride home and that thought kept bouncing around in my head. I knew there was more to that simple statement than what was being said on the surface but I learned a long time ago that if there was something nagging at my brain, my best approach was to alternate between consciously thinking about it and then let it settle into the subconscious while I distracted myself with other thoughts, reading or quiet time. Being on an airplane (sometimes) offers the perfect environment for that process.
Soon a very old book began to emerge in my thoughts. The Road Less Traveled written in 1978 by M. Scott Peck. The opening sentence of that book is three simple words: “Life is Difficult.” Think about all the complaining, whining, protesting, etc. that you hear today and if you look behind those actions you’ll find a belief that life is supposed to be easy. It isn’t. Life is difficult.
What I remember about that book is that after that opening sentence, Dr. Peck, a psychiatrist, spends the rest of the book describing how the avoidance of pain and suffering leads to mental illness. I have seen this principle played out in corporate leadership teams over many years. Leaders and teams who subtly but consistently avoid the pain and suffering associated with hard decisions began to create an environment and culture that could easily be labeled as mentally ill. These leaders and teams begin avoiding almost all decisions because they’ve built up the habit of not dealing with the difficult decisions. Life is difficult. Don’t assume that if you make all of the right decisions, personal and professional, that you’ll cruise through life and just won’t have to deal with the hard stuff.
As my client says, he always takes the hard route of admitting he was wrong. It actually makes the difficulties of life, leading and teaming easier to deal with.
Remember, it’s harder to say you’re wrong than say you’re sorry. Do the hard thing. It’s always easier in the long run.