This series of posts is based on an article written by Travis Bradberry in Forbes titled “12 Habits of Genuine People.” You can catch last week’s discussion here.
Here is his list of 12:
- They don’t try to make people like them.
- They don’t pass judgment.
- They forge their own paths.
- They are generous.
- They treat everyone with respect.
- They aren’t motivated by material things.
- They are Trustworthy.
- They are thick-skinned.
- They put away their phones.
- They aren’t driven by ego.
- They aren’t hypocrites.
- They don’t brag.
In this post, I would like to consolidate points 8 and 3.
Thick Skinned and Forge their Own Paths
Thick Skinned or Comfortable in Their Own Skin.
Thick Skinned is an interesting concept. The dictionary definition says “insensitive to criticism or insults.” This seems to say that in their desire to forge their own paths, they are a “damn the torpedoes, full steam ahead” kind of person. This seems to indicate a loner or a person totally on an island forging their own paths.
I don’t experience genuine people that way. To me a genuine person is warm and open, inviting and embracing. They’re not a loner or an isolated figure taking on the world with their own view of how things should or could work. They’re engaging and inviting. They’re genuine!
I don’t find genuine people thick-skinned, I find them practical, looking for truth and reality and being open to different perspectives and understanding. The reason they don’t seem to be affected by criticism and insults is that they are confident of who they are yet open to other’s beliefs and assumptions. They don’t take statements as criticism or insults because they see others as trying to express a different point of view, even if they’re doing it very poorly.
I wouldn’t consider genuine people as thick skinned, I would consider them as being comfortable in their own skin. They’ve been open to criticism and different points of view while being self-reflective enough to put the other point of view in perspective with their own view of the world.
Forge Their Own Path
Again, I don’t see genuine people forging their own path in complete isolation. They are constantly looking at, listening to and trying to understand the world around them. They do however remain optimistic about forging a path to a new and better place. While they do experience discouragement, they don’t really get discouraged. While they do face obstacles, they don’t feel like or behave like victims. Maybe we can think of them as the early pioneers. What moved them forward through great setbacks, discouragement and obstacles was their belief in a better life in the west.
They didn’t do it alone. Those who tried died. They didn’t do it without the guidance of those who went before them. They were realistic about the obstacles, threats, and dangers. Yet, they kept going. Forging their “own” paths.
Their “courage” came from their vision of a better future. But the path they took was with other people to offer support and care as well as guides and mentors who have experienced some if not all the path forward.
Genuine people are comfortable in their own skin and forge a path to a new and better future with companions along the way.